i had sex with a girl who genuinely likes me one night… when she went home cause of work in the morning i went to a strip club and had sex with 3 strippers in a private room
Well, if you really had sex with strippers at a strip club, you probably had to empty your bank account to do it. It’s like giving to the collection plate, but skipping a step.
I’m a Republican who hates the gay like Leviticus says I should. This week, I got busted for DUI outside a gay bar, where I had been attending a Latino drag queen pageant. Now everyone thinks I’m gay, when I was just in there trying to save the damned souls through some “one-on-one” counseling with the man I was bringing home for the night.
What should I do?
Oh, Roy. Being gay is fine. For the DUI, you’re going to Hell.
I’m currently on business travel. For diner I decided to have the filet with stuffed shrimp and a few beers, just because I could. The company is paying for it, after all. Hopefully the work I do here will grant me a slot for the work to be done in Hawaii, maybe even a bonus. I could have been reading technical manuals tonight, but instead I went to a dance club. I watched all those fine, barely dressed, nubile, half my age, women on the dance floor. I would have killed to have been one of those guys they were dancing with. I wish I could have been born with the genetics that makes me more like one of them. Forget them! I’m way smarter than any of them anyway! I have a masters degree and I’m going for my PhD. I’m sure I make much more money than anyone there. Nevertheless; I now sit in my hotel room, alone, divulging my sins to a web page devoted to a religion I do not believe in. Fuck my life.
Next time, instead of the trip try video conferencing.
I’ve been having impure thoughts about the mother from Leave it to Beaver. What’s wrong with me???
Take comfort in the knowledge that you are not the first to be tempted by the sultry ways of June Cleaver.
I seem to find myself getting turned on very easily and over many, many, many, many, many things. I think I am sexually attracted to everything. Men, women, (of all races, creeds, and religions), anthropomorphic animals, celebrities, cartoon characters, regular animals, inanimate objects, robots, religious figures, historical figures, action figures, blankets, children, The Olive Garden, vehicles, anything that lists the alphabet, food and drink, and the list just goes on and on. Am I evil?
“Sex is natural, sex is good,” so sayeth the Book of George Michael.